Photo by Ron Lach

Why Knowing Isn’t Enough: The Difference Between Insight and MOMsight

Have you ever found yourself saying, “I know exactly what I’m doing, but I can’t seem to stop”?

You’ve read the books. You’ve listened to the podcasts. Maybe you’ve even spent years in therapy unpacking your patterns. You have awareness—you can see yourself snapping at your kids, overextending yourself, or falling back into the same exhausting cycles. You know the triggers. You understand the why.

And yet… nothing changes.

If this resonates, you’re not alone. And more importantly, you’re not broken. What you’re experiencing is the gap between insight and embodied transformation—a gap I call the difference between insight and MOMsight.

What Is Insight?

Insight is the ability to see clearly into the nature of a situation, experience, or pattern—especially internal ones like thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. It’s that lightbulb moment when unconscious patterns become conscious. It’s the “aha!” that helps you understand why you feel or act a certain way.

For example, insight might sound like: “I know I snap at my kids when I walk into a messy kitchen because the clutter makes me feel out of control and anxious.”

That’s valuable awareness! Insight is a crucial first step. We truly cannot change what we’re not aware of. But here’s where it gets tricky: insight alone doesn’t translate into embodied change.

Why Insight Falls Short

There are two biological facts that explain why awareness isn’t enough:

First, 90-95% of your experience is driven by unconscious programming living in your nervous system. That means only 5-10% of the time are you operating from your conscious, thinking mind—your prefrontal cortex where discernment and choice live. Most of the time, you’re on autopilot, being driven by deeply ingrained patterns.

Second, 80% of communication flows from your body to your brain, while only 20% goes from your brain to your body. This is the difference between “top-down” approaches (like traditional talk therapy and cognitive work) and “bottom-up” approaches (somatic, body-based practices).

When I learned these statistics as a mother and business owner, my efficiency drive kicked in. Why would I work on the 20% or the 5-10% when I could work on the 80% or the 90-95% and change the way I am at baseline?

The answer: because bottom-up work requires us to actually feel and practice, not just think and understand. And let’s be honest—that’s harder.

Introducing MOMsight

MOMsight is the framework I teach in the School of Mom, and it stands for Mothering Ourselves Mindfully. MOMsight is the integrated awareness that emerges when a mother tunes into her thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and nervous system patterns with mindful curiosity, self-compassion, embodied presence, and discerning action.

This isn’t just insight from the mind—it’s full-bodied seeing. It’s a felt sense of knowing that’s rooted in the practice of mothering ourselves mindfully.

Insight vs. MOMsight: What’s the Difference?

Let me break it down:

Insight is:

• Mental understanding or realization
• Often cognitive and intellectual
• Focused on the why something is happening
• Can be passive—even a way to avoid doing the actual work
• Useful for naming patterns

MOMsight is:

• Embodied awareness that integrates nervous system, emotions, and inner parts work
• Somatic and relational—you feel what’s going on
• Focused on how to respond with compassion, regulation, and intentional action
• Active, practiced, lived in the body daily
• Necessary for transforming patterns

Think of it this way: Insight is a moment of clarity. MOMsight is a way of being.

Why This Changes Everything

Here’s what I know from my own journey and from working with hundreds of mothers: when you can see and feel the full dance of the human experience happening in your body, you’re no longer a victim to it. You’re no longer trapped, feeling hopeless about making change.

The beautiful thing about nervous system work and embodiment is that it continues to work “underneath the hood.” It’s like winter—it looks like nothing is happening above ground, but there’s profound growth occurring beneath the surface.

The mothers I work with often tell me, “Sarah, I just started to feel differently. I’m with my mom or my in-laws, or my kids are melting down, and normally I’d be running hot—but I just feel grounded. Steady. Stable.”

That’s the product of MOMsight.

The Catch: You Have to Choose the Unfamiliar Path

Here’s the challenging truth: your nervous system will choose a familiar hell over an unfamiliar heaven every time.

Those patterns keeping you stuck—the overgiving, the lack of boundaries, the anxiety, the shame—they don’t want you to change. There’s a part of you that’s exhausted and knows these patterns aren’t serving you or your kids. But those patterns feel safe because they’re known.

This is why we need to consciously choose new paths, even when they feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar. And this is why we don’t do this work alone.

Ready to Move Beyond Insight?

If you’re tired of knowing what needs to change but not being able to actually shift, if you’re ready to move from awareness to embodied transformation, I invite you to start with the Flourished Mother Starter Kit—five nervous system practices to help you respond rather than react.

And if you’re ready to go deeper, join me on January 28th for UNSUBSCRIBE—a powerful 90-minute gathering where we’ll collectively release the patterns that are no longer in alignment with who we’re becoming. We’ll honor the threshold from the year of the snake (releasing and shedding) to the year of the horse.

This isn’t a casual webinar you half-listen to while folding laundry. This is a sacred practice. Hire a babysitter. Lock the door. Show up for yourself.

Because we’re not passing along another generation of shame and unconscious patterns. We can’t, mama. It’s not an option.

Your awareness is powerful—but your embodiment is transformational.

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Listen to the full episode and get all the resources at Mothering Ourselves Mindfully Podcast. Ready to begin? Download the Flourished Mother Starter Kit HERE or register for UNSUBSCRIBE HERE.